Open Relationship

this is a setting you facebook reader would definitely be familiar with, where you could set under your relationship status.

out of the blue - which is not so blue anyway - it struck my mind as what the heck is actually an 'open relationship' which i was like LIC GAS in the past. Anyway, i decided to google it somehow and found some arguments on it, or rather 'definitions' from various people with different angles of perspective/

From the modern point of view, it is seen as an open relationship where one person does not own the other.
The couple are not exclusively seeing each other and can date, flirt and hook up with other people should they wish to do so. in a true open relationship, the couple will be fully honest with each other (unlike most regular relationships).

They will not get pissed at each other for stupid things such as not ringing the day before, wearing a slutty top, passing out cold in a club, kissing that gay in the lift. In fact, they will just love each other for who they are and support each other through times of need.

Although other people will say they are sluts and it will never work, they only say this because they are jealous.
In the end the couple will get bored of seeing other people because they realize they are the best two out there. then they get married and have beautiful children. and retire together in Goa. which if they actually get that faaaaar anyway.

Some sees it as a relationship in which two people agree that they want to be together, but can't exactly promise that they won't see other people too. Basically, to have it all: a significant other and the freedom to hook up with other people. Common during college for many post-high school relationships.

On the other hand, is it basically just a facebook setting that allows you to give in to your sluttastic urges while keeping a "safety net" around in the event that you're unable to hook up with anything better?

or just a great way to set yourself up for some hell-ish drama, instead of being honest with your significant other?


Well, i would see it as a stepping stone for both sides to kick start a relationship, where it acts as a phase for both parties to understand each other more and appraise how far the relationship could lead to - especially when you are up in the air of your stand - so that both parties would not end up getting hurt + crushed so much if it goes cheesy; and if it goes well, it would be more steady and sturdy. No?

so what do you think about an open relationship?


i don't trust myself
Nsxon x

Chocolate Chips in the Cookie of Life

what does friendship insinuate to you? well, it plays a significant role to me, in my own singular way.

The blessing it is to have a friend to whom one can speak fearlessly on any subject; with whom one's deepest as well as one's most foolish thoughts come out simply and safely. Oh, the comfort — the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person — having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all right out, just as they are, chaff and grain together; certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and then with the breath of kindness blow the rest away.

yeah. i used to get pleasure from this kinda relationship too, until its virtue was turned into vulnerability and the trust of my friendship got grassed on. Eversince, masquerade starts to pile on when the pure value of innocence is stripped off, bit by bit, with the mendacious reality brought to light, as time sneaks pass.

i started to shield myself and not to trust anyone easily. i evaluate and appraise beforehand. besides, i have a bad tendency not to blend in initially. if you want to know me, you'll have to make the first move. and i need warming up. well, unless you are really that special that i would regret not knowing you :)

It is amazing how you can surround yourself with so many people you can call friends, and yet actually only have one or two real ones. i would prefer a very small group of friends whom i can call them one of my best peeps. somebody to be really close and cool. and someone whom i can call up at 4am.

What do you seek in a friend?

someone who brings out the best in you?

someone who is there for you when he'd rather be anywhere else?

someone who knows all about you, and still likes you?

someone who have seen you change; they've let you change?

someone who who overlooks your failures and tolerates your success?

someone who knows the song in my heart and sings it to me when my memory fails?

someone who knows your weaknesses but shows you your strengths; feels your fears but fortifies your faith; sees your anxieties but frees your spirit; recognizes your disabilities but emphasizes your possibilities?

When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving much advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a gentle and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing, and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares.

For me, the important thing is someone who sits next to you without talking, and still makes you feel comfortable. i believe both true friendship and love come when the silence between two people is comfortable.

Sometimes being a friend means mastering the art of timing. There is a time for silence. A time to let go and allow people to hurl themselves into their own destiny. And a time to prepare to pick up the pieces when it's all over.

All in all, I want friends who are kind of like me, who go with the flow and like to have fun. Better, friends who are knowledgeable, someone whom i could learn things from, not only an one-way rapport. someone who don't mind me sharing what i know with an open heart. someone who don't mind listening me grudging. someone who knows well when to say something and when to shut up. And it's grateful to know that i do have such friend encircling me now :)

what is more? the most essential thing in friendship is to trust and be trustworthy. Someone whom I may be sincere and before him, I may think aloud. well, i would know that when one day i no longer protect myself by a fence, but rather by my friends.


I'll lean on you and you lean on me and we'll be okay.
Nsxon x